Traditionally, I have loved a New Year. Although I've never really loved seeing them in - generally that part has always been a tad disappointing. However the symbolism of beginnings has always appealed and, somehow, the Start of the Whole Year usually even more so. For many years I have taken a little bit of time to reflect on the year that was - enjoying in and cringing at the memories in equal measure - and have used that as a basis for making New Year's resolutions. Some years, I have written earnest letters to myself recapping my journey thus far and sketching out a rough plan for the one ahead. These little private treatises would document what I thought was important and who I thought I ought to be in the year to come.
I feel a little envious of that past Me, to be honest. Life was much simpler then (although I was wracked by the obvious and massive complexity of it at the time) and my connections and responsibilities were much lighter. Perhaps that is why I find it difficult to find the space and time to repeat the exercise now that my life is so very different. I have let the weight and significance of the coming New Year hover around me over the last week but despite being offered this perfect and timely opportunity to Set Goals and list Important Character Traits to Develop, I have not done a thing. Not a one. Oh, I've flirted with a few ideas. But, late at night, when I should be sleeping, I find any earnest resolution making quickly deteriorates into a sleepy fantasy world where we have come into generous amounts of money, all my friends and relatives live nearby, and we have unlimited free babysitting. Some wiring seems to have shorted in my head so that resolution has become wishlist and I can't seem to overcome it. There are worse fates, I suppose.
Before I give up completely, though, let me take the luxury of this little writing space to resolve to do at least three things this year:
Firstly, and most earnestly, I resolve to generously believe in myself and my skills.
Secondly, and most yearnfully, I resolve to make time for me.
Thirdly, and most unrealistically, I resolve to find a way to come into generous amounts of money, to move all my friends and family close to me, and to find unlimited free babysitting.
Happy New Year!
PS: These photos are a little snapshot of Christmas 2010. In order they are: 1. Tiny the King of the Christmas Dinner Table; 2. "opening" a present; 3. sledding for the first time; 4. on Lake Cordova, Boxing Day.
Wishing you a wonderful new year...and definitely a bit more time to yourself...generous amounts of money would be good too! I can certainly appreciate your first resolution.
ReplyDeleteI've never been a resolution making sort of person. Perhaps I have felt that I was setting myself up to only fail. That sounds awfully negative! Simply put, as an "oldish" lady, it's a blessing to have another year!
Best to you, Ellen.
Every best wish for 2011 to you and yours, may it be above all healthy and filled with love and laughter.
ReplyDeleteHave never been one for New Year's Resolutions, but endorse yours most heartily Believe in yourself and your many skills as if you are your own best friend. It has been my observation that we are often more forgiving of, and more giving to our friends than ourselves; so it seems a wise move to become our own best friend!
I agree I agree I agree! So much of what you write resonates with me, especially when I look back on my previous self and feel quite baffled! I have given up resolutions and for me the new year begins just after the solstice so it has even less significance. But. Is there ever really a bad time to think about what you want life to be? I love your wishes and would happily have them all as my own : )
ReplyDeleteThanks for your lovely comments on my blog, it is great to hear I am not the only crazy snow lover out there!